Posts Tagged ‘observance’

Dear Robyn,

OK real real short one. What do you make of this? (video at end of post – if anyone needs captions I can make some but the donkey is the only one with an sort of intelligence and he doesn’t really say much…)

This morning on the Breakfast programme news they ran a story about an animal cruelty investigation in Russia where some beach hooligans strapped a donkey to a parasail and power boat and sent it for a fly around the beach (just like the tourists do). They are now likely to get two years in jail for this thoughtless act and good job too! Cruelty to animals is a horrible thing.

Hosts, Pippa and Paul Henry’s reactions to this were classic. Pippa of course thought it was mean and didn’t find it funny at all but predictably Paul cracked up completely in hysterics and I confess to replaying the article a few times just to watch him lose it! And I am ashamed to say that despite my (sometimes overly) kindhearted nature with these sorts of things, a hurtling donkey in space does look pretty hilarious and I joined the “rofling” party with a disturbing lack of restraint…  (rofl = rolling on floor laughing)

But it got me thinking that it’s interesting how we perceive things. It’s easy to agree with Pippa that the beach goers’ actions were cruel since the experience for the donkey would no doubt have been pretty stressful. But would sending it for a fly have earned those “hooligans” the same cruelty charge if the situation had been very different? What say there had been some sort of natural disaster and it was stranded on the beach and likely to drown if someone didn’t act? What if those same guys saw it’s predicament, harnessed it to a helicopter and sent it into the air in order to rescue it? Perhaps risked their own lives to do it? The donkey would still have been scared witless but  those guys would now be getting media attention for their kindness instead and we’d be calling them heroes not hooligans!

The bottom line though is donkeys were not built for flying. It’s pretty mean to send them into space for no good reason. Sheep and cattle were not designed to be hurtled down a motorway at 100 kph, crammed into a rattling, dusty truck full of manure and other nervous, frightened animals for hours on end either but we do this sort of thing to them every day in the name of dinner without batting an eyelid. We don’t care. It’s called farming. On the other hand, if  “hooligans” were to do the same thing by borrowing a sheep from a paddock, stuffing it into the back seat of their souped up Nissan Sylvia and go for a jaunt around the block for half an hour before returning it, that would easily grab the SPCA’s attention and get everyone fired up with cruelty accusations!

Kind of weird how things look to us in different contexts huh?

Morgan 🙂

Here is the video for anyone who wants to test their cruelty <–> hilarity meter… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0x1G_e_0GIw or here…

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Dear Morgan,

I left Auckland on Thursday morning, after dropping my daughter off at the Space Station where she flew back to her Planet for another few years.  I decided to travel by car to Wellington, rather than use my spaceship.  I wanted to see what it was like.

Travel was.  Well.  Slow.  One was continually on the lookout for cars that flashed red and blue lights.  There were also cameras – on power lines, and even in trees.  Apparently my photograph is highly sought after.  I’ve heard that these photographs are then sold back to the drivers for quite large sums of money.  Crazy stuff.

The strangest phenomenon though was on something called passing lanes.  These are apparently lanes where faster cars can overtake slower cars.  However, according to the road code, one must not exceed the speed limit of 100km while passing.

So here you are, meandering along behind someone going at 80km, and hoping for a chance to pass, when you come to a passing lane.  Without exception, EVERY single time, everyone speeds up to the speed limit of 100km for the whole length of the passing lane.  No one passes.  Then right at the end of the passing lane, the car in front slows down to 80km again.  Then you have to meander along behind, hope for a chance to pass again.

There must be some sort of accelerator booster on the side of the road at the start of these lanes.  I can only think of one other reason.  Stupidity.   Dumbass.   Idiot.  Fuckwit.   Arrogance.  Jerk.  Okay, that was more than one reason but I’m sure you get the drift.

Hours later I arrived at our destination.  Next time I’m taking the spaceship!

Cheers

Robyn

Dear god X11CP7, we’ve landed on a strange planet. How did the mothership end up here? Did you set the warp co-ordinates for worm hole ZP123 or ZP498? We don’t appear to even be in the right galaxy anymore.

Y98R2

(Incidentally, I mind read a passing alien and have concluded that we would be wise to go by the names of Robyn and Morgan while we are stuck here. These beings appear to have genders – strange concept. These names apparently are ambiguous so we should blend in nicely).

(Incidentally #2, the mind read alien had a memory stored in it’s database of some leader names. One of these was “hill in cluck”. There were other names also but I cannot determine which one is current as the indexing system on this model of brain is quite primitive and all the data is scrambled randomly. Some sort of  security encryption perhaps? We will have to figure out how to crack this later.)